Working Mom's and Stay at home Dad's
  • It seems like there is an increase in the role reversal as far as the stereotype goes for men and women. There appears to be an increase in the women that go out and bring home the paycheck while the men stay at home, clean the house, make dinner and take care of the kids. I was wondering if this is something that others are seeing as well and what peoples thoughts were on this topic.
  • For about a year I was a stay at home dad. Lost my job, so while I searched for new work I was the "man of the house." I'll be honest, it was pretty cool at first. I love my son, and having that time with him is something I'll never regret, and always cherish. But, I really did miss working. It's weird to wake up and go to work for 5 straight years to the same job and then one day, you just don't.

    So for me, it was a great bonding time with my son, but I'm glad to be back out there, working my butt off again for the crappy wages that I make.

    My dad is a stay at home dad. Well, he is now for my little sister (she's 8). He has lost most of his eyesight, so he can't do much, like driving or reading. But, he takes care of the house, helps my sister with homework, you know, the usual. And I think he really likes having that time with her. And my mom loves not having to come home and clean!
  • lol I don't see men making dinner and taking care of the kids... at least not very well xD...
  • If both partners are happy with the arrangement then great. I haven't really thought about it much beyond that.
  • I'm down for being a trophy husband. :)
  • knowname said:
    lol I don't see men making dinner and taking care of the kids... at least not very well xD...


    you just might be surprised how easy some men find it to be and what is even more surprising is that sometimes the men play the mom role better than some of the women, and sometimes the women play the provider role better.

    I personally don't see an issue either way as long as the person that is best suited for staying at home mom/dad is the one that is doing it.

    Another question that I have is say that one of the partners is able to make a good amount more money in comparison to what the other can bring home. The choice is made that someone needs to cut down their hours at the very least or to stay at home all the time. The partner that makes more money is the one that is best suited to care for the child(ren) and the other offers very little as far as being able to raise children goes. Who should be the one to stay at home at that point? Lets also say that either way a life style change is needed and they will have a hard time making the bills unless they move to a different area that is less expensive... Would your answer change?

    I have known several men that stayed at home. I know one decided 2 months in that he wanted a job again because playing mom was to hard. Another still plays the mom and believe it or not is pretty good at it and does a better job than she does. Another person that I know that does it is pretty good but doesn't cook or clean but the attention that is needed for the kid(s) is being met. Like I said sometimes you might be surprised.
  • yeah I was talking about the last type out of the three you pointed out in your last statement. I agree with your statement, and that's fine in the short run but men aren't built for the home. I'm not arguing with 'evolution', men also suffer with dimensia much earlier than women. I sure as hell wouldn't want one raising my kids heheheh
  • Stay at home dads cannot raise children well.
  • Then I guess it is a very good thing that you are not a stay at home father. The way that I see it though is that people that have a hard time being a father and raising children that are their own are also the ones that do not make good husbands because of the lack of affection that they have not only for their own child let alone their spouse.

    It takes more than money to raise a child, it takes more love than anything else. If someone is not capable of that love then they should stay away from having any children.
  • GreyAcumen said:
    Stay at home dads cannot raise children well.


    This right here (knowname, don't be afraid to jump in on this as well):
    [video]http://www.hulu.com/watch/14646/buffy-the-vampire-slayer-whats-my-line-part-1?c=1045:1051[/video]

    Too mean? Maybe, but the truth is mean.
  • knowname said:
    lol I don't see men making dinner and taking care of the kids... at least not very well xD...


    I'm actually quite great at cooking, and have gotten tons of positive feedback about the types of food I prepare. Not only that, I'm quite good with kids. It's a great feeling to actually get a child to sleep, and stop crying when no one else can. Not all men are cursed with the inability, and fear of cooking and caring for children.

    My opinion is, it shouldn't be a gender specific role at all. So what if the man stays home and wants to cook, clean, etc?
  • Manio said:
    I'm actually quite great at cooking, and have gotten tons of positive feedback about the types of food I prepare. Not only that, I'm quite good with kids. It's a great feeling to actually get a child to sleep, and stop crying when no one else can. Not all men are cursed with the inability, and fear of cooking and caring for children.

    My opinion is, it shouldn't be a gender specific role at all. So what if the man stays home and wants to cook, clean, etc?


    But can you do both at once??
  • knowname said:
    But can you do both at once??


    Yes, had to multiple occasions. A girl I dated a few months back had a child of her own and I would often visit and help take care of the kid when she was out doing things. Not a hassle, and I found it to be a good bonding experience, and a learning experience at that. Granted, the kid wasn't annoying, or fussy and everything worked out fine.
  • I'm not saying guys like you don't exist, I'm not even saying it's all that hard to do (though really it is... but it can seem easy once you get used to it I bet) I myself am more handy in the house than out of it... but really, if I took my twin sister outside and we were both trying to learn the same job I GUARANTEE you I'd be better and/ or more efficient at it over time. Just a fact- my bones are stronger, muscles are more re.... (developable... word fail) I can take more punishment if not bounce back quicker. What I'm saying has nothing to do with what I'd RATHER do it's just what "evolution" deems more appropriate. I'm not saying you wouldn't be good at it, I'm not saying it's not a worthwhile venture either, I'm simply saying Why do some of us insist on arguing with evolution? (not a religious question) It's great that you have developed the skills to do this, I just bet that with equivalent fervor a woman with her intuition, intelect and hormonal advantages can do it better, easier and/ or more efficient than you (assuming your a guy).
  • oh nevermind that's my peice I don't want to say anymore :/ not guaranteeing but... I'll try :P
  • You're honestly willing to say that you, because you're a man, will, given enough time, be better at any job than you sister? That seems like a rather bold, albeit unfounded, claim.
  • my twin sister with no other advantage over me than what god (evolution) gave her. It IS a bold and unfounded claim though I'll agree with you there. It's not a fact just what I claim to believe.
  • Even though someone is a woman doesn't mean that evolution made her a better parent. Being a good mother or father I think is a learned behavior than an inherited one. Now I'm not saying that it your mother or father was the worse on in the world then that will mean that you will be as well... I am also not saying that those that had great parent will be a good mother or father.

    Part of it has to do with your child hood that is true but so much more of it is the kind of person that you are and how you grow into your role as a mother or father. Nobody knows what to do with their first child in the very begging, at least no one i have ever met, its a learning process just like everything else.
  • I kinda wonder what's going to happen in this regard when I finally end college and get to work.

    I might end up the stay at home mom simply because there's no daycare spots in that tiny town in which hubby and I live. I went back to college precisely to avoid this situation, so we could both find work and good paying work wherever and not have to worry about lack of anything due to population shortage causing lack of services. I mean, I'd have no problem staying home to care for kids but goddamn I think i'd go a tad insane after a while cooped up in a house with a wailing poop machine. I love kids but any child will drive anyone crazy without a break. I honestly don't know how some parents do it and have huge amounts of respect for those that do and love it.
  • Manio said:
    Yes, had to multiple occasions. A girl I dated a few months back had a child of her own and I would often visit and help take care of the kid when she was out doing things. Not a hassle, and I found it to be a good bonding experience, and a learning experience at that. Granted, the kid wasn't annoying, or fussy and everything worked out fine.


    I read that as:
    Yes, had to multiple occasions. A girl I dated a few months back had a child of her own and I would often visit and help take care of the kid when she was out fucking other people. Not a hassle, and I found it to be a good bonding experience, and a learning experience at that. Granted, the kid wasn't annoying, or fussy and everything worked out fine.


    Sorry but there is no way in hell that I would ever be the babysitter boyfriend.
  • lol heheh cuz that's the only reason women go out.
  • Single moms get to go out??? and have a life??? REALLY??? shit I need to find a boyfriend that will watch my kids so I can go out and find someone else. Can not believe that I have not thought of that before. Oh well maybe next time.

    Manio said:
    Yes, had to multiple occasions. A girl I dated a few months back had a child of her own and I would often visit and help take care of the kid when she was out doing things. Not a hassle, and I found it to be a good bonding experience, and a learning experience at that. Granted, the kid wasn't annoying, or fussy and everything worked out fine.


    But seriously Manio I give you kudo's for that but that is also one of the pet peeves that I have. Now I dont know the situation or how long it was for or what she was doing while you were watching the kid but imo a boyfriend should never be watching the kid(s). Its great that you bond with them so don't get me wrong but till there is a ring on her finger they are hers to deal with and not yours. Like I said dont know the situation or for how long it was but still. I can think of one time that I have had my boyfriend watch some of my kids while I was out and that was when I was in the ER with my daughter.

    I also feel that it is bad when a boyfriend bonds to much with kids too early into the relationship. I have discovered that its more harmful to the kids that way... but that would be another topic for a different day.

Howdy, Stranger!

It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!

In this Discussion

Most Popular This Week