Rate the Last Movie You've Seen!
  • There's an old Australian movie (mid-90's) called "Children of the Revolution" if comedy about Stalin is your thing.




    I watched "Altered Carbon" and "Black Mirror" on Netflix while mindlessly grinding Monster Hunter and have to say I rather enjoyed both of them. Altered Carbon was a bit silly in parts but overall a good time. Cyberpunk rarely gets done at all let alone well so this was good to see. Black Mirror was fucking excellent. It's like a modern sci-fi Twilight Zone.
  • Pacific Rim: Uprising

    Kinda bad. I liked it, but I cannot really defend it. I like giant robots punching Godzilla so much that if you cannot make it suck like Transformers, then I will find it passable. No Del Toro means much less personality and less interesting visuals. It does try to have an original idea or two, but they are basically dumb. If you loved the first one as much as I did, then check it out. If you did not like the first one, then every sentence of this paragraph beyond the first two have been a waste of your time and I apologize.
  • The Wailing: 7/10

    Gory, yucky demonic fest. Compelling, human, flawed main character who manages to be both incompetent and distant but strangely relatable. Some of the humor comes at odd times, and some of the tragedy seems a bit over the top in how sudden and coincidental it is. Very dark film; by the end, you feel like you need to wash yourself off. It's a film that says nothing but that humanity is cruel and unjust no matter your age or wealth or religion or job. A lot of feints early on about nationalism and traditionalism but the back part of it really drops a lot of character turns and shows that it's really just about humanity as a whole. Most of the revelations are effective. Enjoyable, grisly film, not quite great but will keep your interest from front to back.
  • Mute: 4/10

    A visually appealing if rote piece, Mute suffers from a host of try hard factors, a lack of any compelling message, and a host of dodgy coincidences. Paul Rudd and Alexander Skarsgard all glare at the camera with bulging eyes, Rudd dropping heavy handed swear words and emptying himself of all the hate and spite in him, but it feels forced. It's one of those movies that attempts to be transgressive and controversial without any reason as to why. Murder, pedophilia, and more are all on display, but none are treated as more than passing glances of depravity or, even in some cases, shock punchlines. Where this movie is at its best is when it comes tantalizingly close to saying something. Leo's mute characters stumbles around a futuristic world that still puts up barriers to his existence; a fast food place that delivers by drone only takes order by voice, for example. But the movie only scratches at that surface a few other times. There's even some cheesy slow mo and flashbacks to make sure the viewer gets everything. There's a silly breath holding coincidence that summons flashbacks to Signs or something similar. Other than the cool if typical pastiche of clubs and use of color and makeup, a decent soundtrack, and a few compelling side characters, particularly the underutilized Maksim and Naadirah, who come off as natural and comfortable and world-fitting, this movie flounders too much.
  • Ready Player One

    Beautiful and empty. It is pretty and visually overstuffed, but it has almost no ideas of its own. The pop references are non stop, but make no impact. Even Spielberg using a Kubrick film, which should be amazing, sort of goes nowhere.

    The story is pure Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. But imagine you get inside the factory and it turns out Willy Wonka loves Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland. You would wonder where the original ideas were. The Oasis is all other people's ideas. It does not go anywhere new with all the stuff it borrows. Roger Rabbit borrowed hundreds of characters AND built a whole other world on top of all of that. Roger Rabbit used the source material in service of new ideas. Wreck it Ralph borrowed a ton and built a whole world of new ideas. Ready Player One has no new ideas. It is Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, only with a factory full of 90s nostalgia.

    It is weird to have a video game movie that does not make me want to play a game. It is weird to see Spielberg so unoriginal. It is not a badly made movie, but it is dissapointing.
  • Spielberg figured "Hey, if George and Disney can do it with Star Wars surely I can too". 
  • Ubisoft's marketing team can make better game-based movies than Uwe Boll. 

    This is a short movie style introduction to the nutters at Eden's Gate. 

  • Man, Black Mirror is excellent. Glad you enjoyed it Flibbs.

    As for me?

    Insidious: The Last Key (7/10)

    Rented this on my Xbox and gave it a watch, since this is my favourite modern horror series next to The Conjuring right now. I enjoyed it, albeit the critics taking a collective dump on it. It's not as good as the first film. Hell, none of the sequels were as good as the first, but I find that can be standard horror sequel fare (unless you're Ouija or Annabelle. Their sequels/prequels were immensely better than the originals). The main antagonist demon was a bit lame, and I haven't found myself enjoying any of the baddies since the Black Dress Ghost and Red Faced Darth Maul demon from the original.

    Still though, I have a lot of fun with the Insidious films. If I could rank the four of them as they stand now I'd probably go:

    • Insidious
    • Insidious Chapter 3
    • Insidious: The Last Key
    • Insidious Chapter 2
    This one does however tie up some interesting plot points as it takes place not too long before the original film and has some cool significance to that weird, red door found in the attic of the first film. That was a cool little touch and that events from this film cause the events of the original film. 

    If you've enjoyed the Insidious films you'll no doubt have fun here, and it made enough money to warrant another film in the series, and I'm totally okay with that.
  • A Quiet Place -- 7/10

    Snappy, quick moving, largely successful horror movie. Not exploitative or cheap, nothing profound, no big thematic elements, just 90 minutes of brisk pace and high risk moments. Cool monsters, good, grounded acting and writing, only a couple melodramatic moments, maybe one hamfisted imagery moment, but fantastic use of sound throughout - both music and effects - and a really badass final shot sequence. It's nothing that will rock your world but it's fun and the movie theatre experience is worthwhile for this; the off and on again silence is neat to behold. Fun and effective movie.
  • I just got out of A Quiet Place and I'm left with so many question.  So many things go entirely unexplained, such as the elderly couple in the woods, the origin of the creatures, why the daughter wasn't allowed in the basement, what exactly was up with the "magic hearing-aid" just to name a few.  The bigger problem I have is that the movie literally ended right before the climax.  And I don't really buy the whole 'left open to interpretation' as it's more of a cop out, especially in this scenario.  I will say that the pacing was good, and the audio was great.  Suspense was also on point.  But yeah, I came out if it feeling like I was missing a whole lot.  Probably would give it somewhere around a 5/10
  • The Shape of Water -- 6/10

    Strangely disappointing. The beginning of the relationship felt very rushed and quickly developed into order to move to the thriller part of the plot. I appreciated the schlocky, mid-20th century French romance vibe, but it was very inconsistently applied. Most of the bad guys felt at times like they over acted, lots of harshly strained lines as the movie went on, while most everyone else was on point, particularly the main 3 protagonists. Russian scientist dude was also pretty good. The entire end sequence was both completely predictable and cliché. The musical dance bit was very fun and courageous. I just didn't feel too terribly attached, and while I appreciated the ideas and most of the execution, I can't say it affected me nearly as much as, say, Pan's Labyrinth.
  • Yeah, Grinding Nemo is a very good movie, but it seems an odd pick for the Oscar. I liked it a bunch, but I like other Del Toro better. Pan's Labrinyth is a better, and far more original movie. No, he won't even know your name.  Such a shame we will never see 3993.  I feel like there are many alternate universes where Del Toro has made all the movies I want, I just have to tolerate being oppressed by sentient carrots and such.  Pan's Labrinyth lost to The Lives of Others, one of my favorite movies of all time.  Both were better than The Departed, but by that point, the Academy felt it owed like three Oscars to that guy.
  • Isle of Dogs

    It is beautiful, it looks handmade, it has touching moments, I wanted to like it.... and then it turned into a mess at the end.  It was Life Aquatic all over again.  I am a big Wes Anderson apologist, but this goes in the heap with Life Aquatic and The Darjeeling Limited.  Sometimes Wes pulls it off, sometimes he does not.  I rate this a miss, which is especially disappointing, because I think The Fantastic Mr Fox is the most adorable little movie and I sometimes want to live there.  Anyhoo, Honest Trailers did a really well thought out and funny takedown of Wes Anderson.  The stacks at the end are brilliant.  I love Wes Anderson and all of their criticisms are 100% true.




  • Pan's Labrinyth, The Lives of Others, and Children of Men all came out in 2006, and all (sadly) were better than The Departed. I really hate the "better late than never" awards. 
  • Rampage - 6/10

    Dumb as shit, terrible writing, but it makes up for it by being just a bucket of fun. It definitely strays far from the source material, but I don't think anybody was expecting a cinematic masterpiece.


  • Suicide Squad: Hell to Pay

    It is good, not great.  The previous animated Suicide Squad was better, both are better than the disappointing live action affair.

    It is weird as Hell to me that Warner Brothers has a made alot of great animated DC, but has not made anything live action worth watching since Dark Knight (an overrated but very good movie).  They clearly have good writers.  They do not have to make crap that ranges from disappointing to incoherent.  They have Paul Dini's phone number.  I have said it before and I will say it again: Flashpoint Paradox is a wonderful movie.  It is a direct to video animated movie that may also be my favorite DC movie.  There is a Justice League movie waiting to be made that I would love.  I do not think they can pull off a live action Flashpoint Paradox with their current castings.

    I think Warner Brothers has to stop with the deconstructionist garbage.  DC heroes are even simpler and more straight forward than Marvel heroes.  Superman is truth, justice, and the American way.  Batman is vengeance, he is the night.  They gotta stop over thinking and sucking all the joy out of simple symbols of eternal themes.


    Sadly, just like The Departed, Shape of Water might have been given the Oscar because folks knew Del Toro deserved one for past work.  I think the biggest thing to keep in mind with the Oscars is that all years are not created equal.  Years like 1977 happen a few times per century.
  • Unfriended (3/10): Mostly bad horror movie full of tropes and not scary jump scares and a silly dubstep end credits song. Very few likable characters, very predictable, even the deaths aren't creative. I don't feel like a single character added anything except hacker Kobe, who was good up until the end. And I guess the acting was mostly competent for the main characters. The ancillary characters were wasted and less capable actors. I don't even feel like, for saying as much about social media as it did, it had anything really to say.

    The Titan (3/10): What starts as moderately interesting and creepy even if super cliche and typical goes off the rails. I'm still waiting for one of these to not have the typical evil scientist dude. And the final act is just a mess. It doesn't really end, it's just one super convenience that isn't even allowed to play out, and then it cuts to the resolution. Which doesn't make sense, really. None of this movie makes sense the more you think about it, and the final shot sequence is so bad. There's a cheesy flashback part for good measure, and even the Titan Man's design is uninspiring. This could have been a decent if familiar Frankenstein type piece, especially given it's shift to a woman protagonist very quickly, instead it ended up being a mess of hackneyed elements, shoddy resolution, and silly, silly leaps of faith. There's a frustrating amount of talent wasted here and some actors who can definitely do better. And the movie doesn't end up going at all the way trailers display, for the worse.
  • So, here's a thing. Me & Mrs Littleg have a night out unexpectedly on Saturday night and, under those circumstances, we'd normally go and see a film.  Only problem being the cinemas have all cleared in anticipation of Infinity War so that's pretty much the only thing we could go and see.

    Challenge there is that Iron Man 1 is the only MCU film either of us has watched, and I'm not so keen on spending 2 and a bit hours wondering who everybody is. Should explain, I don't hate MCU.  In fact I like the idea of well-made comic book films, but I heard so many people say about IM1 that it wasn't just a good comic book film, it was a good film on its own, that when I watched it and felt a bit meh, I lost all impetus to watch the rest of them. I keep meaning to catch up, but given the choice between spending what little time I have to myself at the end of the day watching films or playing games, games will always win...

    It's starting to look like me and the ball and chain might have to go out for a meal and a drink and *gasp* talk to each other.
  • So I went to watch Infinity War with the little lady (no seriously she's 5 foot tall) and I loved it, I have seen every single one of these films and it seem's...you really need to for this film. My girlfriend didn't understand a good 80% of what was going on. Infinity war is 2 hours 40 minutes of amazing action and comedy. It is an incredible film but it fully expects that you know whats going on. It explains nothing.

    It doesn't inform you why Captain America is a fugitive, doesn't explain the relationship's that have been built over the last 10 years, it just expects you to know. There are so many in jokes and so much built up knowledge you would miss jumping in here and i fear it would be to your detriment. I did know and I fucking loved every second. 

    I guess, what I am saying is @Littleg, if you have only seen Iron man do not watch this film. Maybe check out Black Panther though, if anywhere is still showing that its very self contained. My girlfriend loved it (I am totally using her as a measuring stick...albeit a very small one). 

    Also dude these films have truly gotten better since Iron Man, each film takes a small step into different themes and genres and most hit the mark perfectly. Give a few a shot I don't think you will regret it.

    Maybe check out Winter Soldier if you like spy like intrigue, or Guardians or Ragnarok if you are down for an amazing comedy. Homecoming is pretty amazing too. Just a few recommendations 
  • @Littleg

    I'm sour on most of the MCU films, that said, there are some that are truly spectacular. They all do build on the universe in some way, but there are a few that I feel are so good that you can watch in absence of the others. If you're interested in seeing some of the other MCU films, then I'd recommend the following as my current top five (in no order, and baring IW): Winter Soldier, Black Panther, Spiderman Homecoming, Guardians of the Galaxy volume 2, and Age of Ultron
  • Do not see Infinity War without watching like at least 12 of the previous films, that would be miserable.

    A bare minimum to get conversant would probably be: Iron Man (1), Winter Soldier, Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy, Civil War, Black Panther.  That skips a bunch of good stuff, but you would at least have some idea as to what the Hell is going on here.

    I was simultaneously impressed with Infinity War, and disappointed by it.  It is stunning, with a ton of action, and interesting team ups and just pay off after pay off for what has been built.  You know who these jokers are, so no more origin crap.  It is disappointing by the structure of the story.  No direct spoilers, but this is Act 2.  Avengers (1) was Act 1:  Thanos sends Loki to Earth, and the Avengers are formed and they stop him.  Age of Ultron and Civil War are clearly Avengers stories, but they have squat to do with Thanos.  Infinity War is Act 2: Thanos shows up and things get as bad as they can get.  This is the nature of Act 2.  You jam your heroes in the deepest hole you can find.  The Empire Strikes Back is the epitome of a cinematic Act 2.

    Unlike some, I saw Empire Strikes Back in the theater... and as a 9 year old... I did not like it much.  I was not old enough to understand that I was in the middle of a drama, not anywhere near it's end.  I did not like seeing the heroes lose, and waiting that long for Return of the Jedi sucked.  It really sucked.  Return of the Jedi is my favorite by a good margin because it just felt so damn good.  Children who get to watch Empire Strikes Back and then gain instant closure with Return of the Jedi will never know.  Teenagers are also emo by nature, and will always prefer the darkness of Empire to the light of Return.  I think if Act 3 does not feel the best, you did not write the best drama that you could have written. Such is life, yes Ewoks suck, different discussion.

    Anyhoo, Infinity War not only ends far from the light, it is not exactly clear about what exactly has occurred, or what exactly the rules are, going forward.  I was not happy at the end of Empire, but I did know where all the characters "were", and I did know what they wanted.  Infinity War is going to require some serious Deus Ex, and they did not do a great job of explaining the rules for that, going forward.  It feels way murkier that Empire.  Infinity War is a blast and I will feel better about it when I know the whole story.  If you went to see a play, and Act 2 ended abruptly and upsettingly... and then they sent you home and said you could not see Act 3 for a year... that is not the best evening.
  • For what it's worth, I like the idea of at some point marathoning a load of Marvel films to catch up, it could be a fun little project for me and missus.  Maybe hunt down a blu ray mega pack or something, if it exists...

    Here's a thought - for what it's worth I quite liked the first two Toby Maguire Spidermens (although I saw the second one on a tiny screen on a plane) but never saw the third, and clearly never saw the Amazings.  Would be funny now to skip all those and watch Homecoming as part of my mega catch-up.
  • I have close to zero interest in MCU but I also have a nephew who loves the shit, so I've seen a few of the movies and heard all about the ones I haven't. The only ones I can recommend without dissolving into a puddle of my own cringe are Thor Ragnarok, and even that one had its moments, or maybe Guardians of the Galaxy 1 & 2, which were both very dumb, but fun. All the other ones I've seen have been closer to trials of endurance rather than films.

    Choose dinner with the missus. Choose bonding with the woman you deemed worthy of spawning your seed into future generations. Choose not to be a grown arse man watching juvenile comic book movies. Choose life. 
  • Winter Soldier, is probably my favorite, and can be seen by itself. Black Panther is another that is rather self contained.

    Spider Man 2 remains the greatest webslinger tale of all time. Who would have thought that Alfred Molina would be the key actor for the trials of Parker?
  • Avengers: infinity War (8/10)

    I liked this more than I thought, which I think is a compliment, I guess, considering how this could have been a total clusterfuck. I was reading how it is just a constant assault on the senses and nonstop extravagance which isn't usually my cup of tea, but there is enough breathing room and each character feels like a character still and not just a costume fill in. There were so many cameos to give that I think they mostly did a good job. Even the humour, if usual, was executed well and genuinely funny. There was even some downtime where characters got to talk and banter and all which was nice. I guess the cons for me would be; Spiderman's shtick is kind of getting old, I hope his humour doesn't rely on citing old pop culture so much. I didn't like how this movie treated Wakanda and Black Panther at all, for reasons that are way too long-winded for this. And finally, without getting into spoilers, the nature of Disney being very clear about what movies are coming out next and already advertising them means any tragedy of these two big battle Avengers movies will be subverted by the fact we pretty much know, without even any cursory Google search, who lives and dies when all this is said and done. And a cursory Google search of contractual obligations real life actors have makes it even clearer. That's hard to zing these movies for themselves when it's just the machinations of Disney trying to make a gajillion dollars on all this, but still.

    Anyways, it was fun, and while I think the ending feels a bit cheap, I think it's expected given what I expect will happen in the next one. I also did some research on the post credit scene, and while I am excited about who it is, I am not excited about how the character has been repeatedly described. It feels a bit bad that both comic nerds and non-comic nerds can sniff out what we know is going to happen a mile a way, again, if only because shareholders are a thing that exists, and the heroes that are yet to show up all have a background that lends to some big time deus ex, although I guess in a few potential ways. And there have been a ton of leaks of set photos from Avengers 4 that, again, don't spell out everything, but def point in a direction. And if we are wrong completely and they don't do at least a bit of what everyone expects, then the retroactively makes Infinity War a worse movie.

    Also, Thanos' entire argument is whack but it's presented in a way that some actual movie goers will sympathize with, which is lazy and bad on the part of his writing.

    Visual spectacle though, good payoff, fun time (well, mostly).

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