Adventure! [closed]
  • [center:fc4ffeff96]Fancy Ass Title Graphic to go here[/center:fc4ffeff96]

    IMPORTANT: Please ask any questions you have! I need feedback on this to make it the best (and as clear as) it can be.

    This contest is more of an exercise in creativity than anything else. The premise is simple. Within a narrative, I'm going to provide you - oh entrepid adventurer - with a series of obstacles. What I want from you is to come up with the best solution you can based on the details provided.

    For example:
    You are walking along one day and you come across a boulder in your path.

    ===
    EXAMPLE TASK "Boulder":
    Pass the boulder to continue down the path.
    ===

    Now, it's a very simple problem, with innumerable simple solutions. I don't want these. I want creative answers.

    What I don't want:
    - I walk around it

    What I do want:
    - I choose my Rhyhorn and have it use Strength on the boulder!
    - I channel the power of Chris Redfield and punch the boulder out of the way!
    - I call upon Indiana Jones to distract the boulder by leading it away down a narrow incline.
    - I use my Druidic Spell "Transmute Stone to Flesh [Friend (Deep)] to turn the boulder into a giant meatball. Then, using my powers of gluttony rivaled only by the greasiest of Italian-American New Yorkers, Tony "Just Big Boned" Bambino, I ignore the cries of my ever balooning stomach and eat my way through the giant meatball.
    - I create a lever using nearby natural materials and hoist the boulder out of the way using only my natural strength and the magic of mechanics.

    Each obstacle will have a Task Name (like "Boulder" above). Fill in your answer for that specific obstacle in the matching section in the Answer Sheet below; Like this.
    Example Answer Sheet said:

    Boulder:
    I create a lever using nearby natural materials and hoist the boulder out of the way using only my natural strength and the magic of mechanics.


    Answer Sheet said:

    Devil:

    Cover System:

    Cerberus:

    Major Tom:

    Minuteman:

    Ecofriendly:

    Snorlaxative:

    Riddle 1:
    Riddle 2:
    Riddle 3:
    Riddle 4:

    Sphinx:

    Cliffhanger:

    Smark:

    Yeti:

    Plumbing:

    JurASSic Park:

    Mortal Kombat:

    Masturbation:



    Also provided is a lovingly crafted illustration of your obstacles. Feel free to use these to illustrate your answers or to simply try to better understand what the fuck I'm trying to say.

    The length of this contest is uncertain. At most it will last until the end of the month. If applications cease arriving in my inbox at a certain point, I will close entry with forewarning. At which point, if you're still working on your answers or plan on participating, and haven't started, but will finish reasonably soon if you start now, contact me and I'll postpone the closing. These doors won't stay open forever!

    Upon closure of entry, I will read everyone's entries and decide the winner. The winner will then receive, in PM, a gift code for Telltale Games' Puzzle Agent

    PM your entries TO ME. I will consider any applications posted in this thread instead of sent to me ans non-entries.

    Members who's join date is listed as after this contest has started may not apply.

    Contest officially begins at 12:00 PST, the dawn of 2011.
  • [center:41b29ef780]image[/center:41b29ef780]

    You've just passed through a magical door into the world of the imaginary. You're in a shadowless white room. In the center of this room sits the reason you're here, a copy of Puzzle Agent inside of an UNBREAKABLE glass case, held down by three magical locks. There are two doors in the room, the one you just came through, seemingly a mirror, the borders of which pearlescently glow with all of the colors of the rainbow and then sone. The other is a door made of fleshy tendrils, in the center of which is set an eye that watches your every movement. Already having had the rules explained to you in the post above, you walk over to the eye door, take a deep breath, and start on your journey.

    [center:41b29ef780]image
    click to view full sized[/center:41b29ef780]

    You open the eye door and walk through into a seemingly normal city street. You take in your surroundings and the casual facade dissipates as you realize you're in your worst nightmare. Open celebration of diversity; a collective populace of slackers, douchebags, porn stars, and illegal workers; a shared border with mexico! You're in California! Seeking any refuge, you rush for a door at the end of the street. A burst of hot sulpherous air and a fragrance of brimstone passes your nose into your lungs. Oh phew, it's only hell. That was close!

    Having just avoided disaster by a hair's breadth, you relax and take in your surroundings. You appear to be in a cave filled with lava. On the opposite end of the room you see a door. Perhaps in eons past, there was a bridge between the two but now the only platform between the two takes the form of a rough pillar of the same stone as the cavern walls. Atop the pillar stands Satan, Lucifer, Beelzebub, Lorf of Hell and all that is Unholy. He cackles and shoulds at you, spouting phrases in an infernal tongue as incoherent to you as Barret's pitiful attempts to express his inane thoughts in English, and yet, unlike Barret's verbal vomit he considers communication, you at least got the jist of his generically demonic speech. He doesn't think you have the balls to get past him! What an asshole! Let's show that fucker.

    Above satan is a single giant stalag...something, hanging from the ceiling. There is a crack running around it's circumference, it's tip being held on by industrial grade bandaids. You think if you can just get it to fall, it stalagmight just crush the devil under the weight of it's massive cliche.

    It is now that you realize that the room is not filled with lava, but the superheated liquified soul of every agnosti, rock musician, roleplayer, palientologist, and anyone who ever "experimented" in college. Remember John 14:6, kiddies!

    ====
    TASK "Devil":
    Get across the pit of juiced non-believers and show that Beelze Bub what-for!
    ====

    Praise Jesus, you successfully avoided eternal damnation; for now! Having just postponed the inevitable, you make your way through the door. On the other side you find yourself at the top of a ladder leading down a deep concrete chasm. Flourescent lights cast a dim light on the piping and black cables running down the stark, aged concrete walls into the depths below. A fog obscures your view down the shaft and you can't tell how far it goes.

    You begin your descent down the ladder, the metal bars sharply icy against the palms of your hands as you grasp them tightly, fearful of dropping into the foggy pit below. A cool wind persistantly blows upward against you creating a faint whisper in your ear.

    You lose track of time as you climb down the shaft; the airflow whispering sweet nothings in your ears.

    Acerbic is not someone from Serbia

    Equestrian is not something you ask someone.

    Your foot hits something flat and hard, your body locks up in shock as you hold on tightly to react to the sudden change. Your brain catches up with it's surroundings and you realize you've made it to the bottom.

    You continue onward and stumble on to a war torn post apocalyptic battlefield. Everything is so realistic and brown. Just as you take a step forward your spider senses tingle and a bullet hits a wall of rubble beside you, kicking up a spout of dust. You quickly dart into cover and try to place where the shot came from. Peeking out from around the cover you see a glint on top of a building in the distance, pulling your head back just before a bullet tears through the space it was just occupying.

    ====
    TASK "Cover System":
    You're safe...for now, but you can't just sit around forever. You have to get across this firing range without having your cranium ventillated.
    ====

    You dramatically crash through a door and into a hallway, having just avoided being someone's target practice dummy. Strewn about the corridor are the butchere bodies of soldiers of some sort. The walls have been cracked under heavy impact and streaked with blood. You'd better get out of here before whoever did this comes back; maybe find a locker to hide in and piss yourself.

    Anachronistically Juxtaposed at the end of the hallway looms an imposing wooden door with heavy ring handles attached to metal wolf heads set in the wood with heavy bolts. You heave the doors open and enter a torchlit room of cobbled stone. Before you stand a hellish hound. It's eyes smolder with red hot fury and saliva glistens off it's needle sharp teeth. It notices you enter and makes a yapping mad dash towards you. Just as it is about to snap you up, it reaches the end of it's chain. It's head snaps back with a "YIPE" and an echoing boom from the chamber that dislodges a layer of dust from the walls. It skitters back a short distance with it's tail between it's legs then turns back and starts to growl menacingly, interjected with yips that threaten to burst your eardrums.

    ====
    TASK "Cerberus":
    Get past the Hellhound. You can't cross the room without being within it's range of Chihuahuan mayhem.
    ====

    You triumphantly pass through the heavy wooden doors on the opposite end of the room. You pass through a dark grotto, in which sits a golden statue of a man. It's not particularly noteworthy or important. You get the feeling that whoever put it there was just trying to fill up some unused space and just thought that this path was lacking in golden statues.

    White buzzing flourescent light pours in through the exit across the cave. You walk into the light and find yourself on the launch platform for a space rocket. The only way you see out is up so you're going to have to use the rocket to continue on your adventure journey quest. You press a button on the side of the capsule mounted at the top of the rocket and a door hisses open. You step inside and admire it's sexy leather interior. You sit in the leopard print pilot's seat and flick the dice hanging from the port hole. You feel up the yoke and take a look at the rockets' readings. Disappointed, you note that it's running on empty. You're going to have to power this thing somehow if you want it to get anywhere.

    ====
    TASK "Major Tom":
    Figure out some kind of fuel or alternate form of propulsion to get the rocket moving.
    ====

    Having powered your rocket, you take your seat and strap yourself in. In your head you commense the countdown, and turn the engine on. You suddenly feel hundreds of pounds heavier as the rocket takes off, shooting into space. The pressure relinquishes and you can feel the gravity of earth being left behind. You release your seatbelt and begin to float in the most peculiar way. The stars look very different, to-day. Here yo are floating around your tin can, far above the world. Planet earth is blue, and there's nothing you can do.

    You make contact with the moon. The door to your pod cracks open and all of the air hisses out. It slowly opens the rest of the way, dramatically revealing the surface of The Moon, USA: The 51st State. You take a massive leap out of your space craft on to the surface of the moon. So this is what if feels like to be black, you racistly think to yourself.

    Your pleasure of finally experiencing the ability to jump, as a white man, is quickly taken away from you by the presense of a gooey green illegal space alien slurping around American property. You'll be damned if a penny of your taxes goes to sending this creatures brood to public school!

    You see the key floating in the gut of the gelatinous monster.

    ====
    TASK "Minuteman":
    Get the key from the alien's stomach. Show it some good ol' fashioned All American tenacity. Comin' over here; takin' our craters...
    ====

    You pick up the slimy key and wipe it off on the ground. Realizing now that you've been holding your breath this whole time (there's no air in space, dummy!) you rush forward through a tall wooden door with a green pattern painted on it; hoping it takes you where you need to be, or at the very least somewhere you can breath.

    [center:41b29ef780]image
    click to view full sized[/center:41b29ef780]

    You pass through the green door and find yourself in the attic of an English nobleman in World War 2 era Britain. The stench of british cuisine and monarchy waft through the air intermixing with the sweet stale aroma of old books. Before you is an old wardrobe, it's doors spread open like the legs of a Barret's mom. Cold fresh air flows from the passage. It beckons you forth into the wardrobe away from the teasoaked biscuit and good mannered queen worshipping patriotism satrating the air; suffocating you like a regular diet of an english breakfast suffocates the circulatory system of the bowler cap adorned English gentleman.

    You enter the wardrobe amidst a collection of period piece costumes that reek of the greasiest of national dishes, "Fish and Chips" which are not actually chips, but are in fact French Fries. Taking something that belongs to other countries (like freedom from India) is more British than the suspicious death of Princess Diana or subsequently losing that stolen property via revolution!

    The wardrobe appears to have a false back, which you deftly remove, opening up to a blast of frigid air and a brush of evergreen branches. You step out of the wardrobe and find yourself in the mysterious magical land of Canada. The environment is nigh inhospitable, only through centuries of cross breeding with the local wildlife can one expect to survive in such a godforsaken land.

    The earth beneath you is hard with permafrost. After a brief stroll through the woods you come to a rickety old rope bridge. The planks are soft with rot and the ropes green and cake with moss. The rope bridge passes over a deep crevass, the bottom of which is known as the hunting grounds of Shawshank, the Bear Headed 'God of the Hunt' of the Fricassee Indians.

    You casually but cautiously stroll across the bridge. Being an adventurer, you know old rope bridges like Chip knows the palm of his right hand.

    On the other of the bridge, you come to a small clearing. In the clearing is one tree of particularly noteworthy girth and verticality. Standing between you and the tree is a middle age man with long pepper frizzy hair and a beard to match. His eyes are deeply set and sullen. Hung loosely over his slouching, gaunt frame is a tunic of seemingly infinite colors, spiraling into endlessness. You, by this point, recognize him as a member of the Seeliest of the Faerie Folk, a mythical being known as a hippie. This particular specimine appears to have crafted trousers out of denim trumpets.

    "Hey Man" he speaketh as you draw near.
    "Got a joint?"

    He flashes you a grin of graying teeth and a blast of halitosis.

    Behind him is another crevass of even greater depth, blocking you from reaching your goal. The tree would make a nice bridge but the Hippie will defend the tree with it's life. Hippies are like Dryads, they bind themselves with a plant in a symbiotic relationship. Only, while Dryads have a mystical connection with their tree, Hippies just sorta hang around and get in people's way.

    ====
    TASK "Ecofriendly:
    Cross this gap. The Hippie will not let you harm the tree
    ====

    You successfully cross the gap! Wow, the way you handled that problem was ingenius! On the other side of this crevass you encounter another object hindering your progress. You initially believe it to be the rotund bulk of a Walmart shopper astride their chariot of scooting, or a spheroid anomaly. It is in fact a napping Snorlax, basking in the sun! Anyone who knows anything about trying to get places knows how to deal with a Snorlax! You whip out your Poké Flute and toot a jazzy tune, to be envied by even the tootiest of flutists; and yet the Snorlax does not budge. You try again, this time playing some modern hit. Perhaps this Snorlax just doesn't UNDERSTAND Jazz, the plebeian. Still nothing. You now notice that this Snorlax has, adorning it's head, some pretty pink earmuffs, acting as sound cancelling headphones!

    ====
    TASK "Snorlaxative":
    Get past this Snorlax!
    ====

    Wow, I would have never thought of that. Upon circumventing the Pokémonically magnitudal longitude of Snorlax's girth, you come face to face with a previously eclipsed giant mangy housecat. It looks at you with evaluating jaundiced eyes and speaks to you with a voice of gravel worn to a fine dust over millenia- talking to you from a time before man can even comprehend.

    "Hullo"

    The earth rumbles as the vibrations travel across space before laying a phat beat on your eardrums which your brain subsequently percieves as

    "Another adventurer, I presume?" he stops to examine your expression "Yes, 'Another'. You don't really think you're the first do you?"

    He then shares a lengthy discourse on the nature of multiple parallel realities and that he, being a creature that exists on all planes of reality, has to deal with the bullshit of everyone who comes through here in every reality's version of "here".

    "Basically, you have to answer my three riddles or else you may not pass, and you'll have to find some other transdimensional gargantual housepet to let you by, and I'll tell you something; such things are not as common as you may think."

    You make mention of the world famous Botswanan Giga-Ferret of Conneticut and he concedes that is an alternative but says,

    "You're already here, so you might as well get this over with."

    The big kitty clears it's throughts after which you expect a furball but thankfully get further details on the task at hand instead.

    "This first one is a practice round, just to give you an idea of what you're up against"

    ====
    Riddle 1: "What is black and white and red all over?"
    ====

    "Fair enough. not what I had in mind but I'll accept that. The correct answer was 'An unwitting individual subsequently encountering angry mobs of clowns, PETA drones, and feudal Europeans'. I would have also accepted 'The multicultural convergance zone of a ghetto, a suburb, and a native reservation'."

    Following the abhorrent display of political incorrectness he hits you with his next riddle.

    ====
    Riddle 2: "What is Slimy, Hairy, Cynical, Tired, and can't spell 'Obfuscated'?"
    ====

    "Yes! How did you manage that one?"

    ====
    Riddle 3: "What is Delicious, Soggy, Malodorous, and has no sense of Irony?"
    ====

    "Subjective but true" he nods

    ====
    Riddle 4: "What is Short, Dull, Rigid, Smooth, and Pariplegic?"
    ====

    "What? Really? It is? Well I never...I mean uh, yes, that is correct. Congratulations, you may pass!"

    As you begin to pass the Sphinxian beast, it turns it's head to face you and says,

    "Uh, I don't usually do this but uh, having to come up with riddles for every hero who ever existed in any universe is kinda tough... Would you mind suggesting a good one that I can use on the next one who comes by?"

    ====
    TASK "Sphinx":
    Come up with a good riddle for the cat.
    ====

    "OOH! That's a good one!" he purrs "and what's the answer?"

    You whisper the answer in his ear as not to give it away to any heroes lurking in nearby shrubbery or under any stones.

    You pass the gargantuan feline, but only just before you find yourself at the edge of a cliff.

    "Tough break Kid, one reality over there's a liquid chocolate slide down to the bottom"

    ====
    TASK "Cliffhanger":
    Get to the bottom of the cliff.
    ====

    "Impressive...certainly no chocolate slide but impressive nevertheless"
    Having reached the base of the cliff you see the door to the next world beside you. It is made of obsidian with gold lining. Before you can go through the door you must get the key in this area though! The key is in sight but you can't get to it yet, there is one last hindrance in your way. The key appears to but the prize of an impromptu ladder match between Tekken's King and Street Fighter's Zangief. It's suspended above a ladder in the center of the ring by two crossing cables drawn between four long poles rising from the turnbuckles. In the ring, King gracefully dances away from Zangief's grasping paws and Zangief completely ignores any striking attacks King tries to down him with. You have no time to watch this display of homoerotically charged violence, you have to get that key! It's all fake anyways. You try to slide into the ring unnoticed but the two wrestlers mistake you for an interloping competitor and make a charge at you. You just manage to get out of the ring before being decimated by a double leg drop. This is going to be tough.

    ====
    TASK "Smark":
    Get the key without getting caught in a slobberknocker with King and Zangief!
    ====

    You grab the key, slide out of the ring. and head for the previously passed door.

    [center:41b29ef780]image
    click to view full sized[/center:41b29ef780]

    Golden light pours through the obsidian doorway as you pull it open. Before you stands a mountainous vista of gold coins from throughout the ages, polished beyond perfection. The room is bathed in blooming light, the universal sign of good graphics. Atop a mound of money on the far side of the room sitsthe head of a massive Eel, protruding from a hole in the wall. It twists it's head to face you and you feel a tingling sensation start in your feet and spread throughout your body. Static begins to build up in your head, a fuzzy whisper in your ears. It grows increasingly louder before clearing up to form a sound-

    "Come here!"

    The eel is communicating with you through electric pulses sent through the golden terrain up through your body and into your head to be interpreted by your brain as language.

    You begin to walk forward, unsure as to whether you're moving by your own choice or because of the innumerable watts of energy using your spinal column as a playground.

    It's maw splits open, it's tongue lolling out like a spongey organic red carpet.

    "You look delicious!"

    You think you can feel smoke coming out of your ears.

    "Aha!" it exclaims as you step forward on to it's tongue. Some saliva drips on your head as it draws you into it's mouth and swallows you. You slide down it's throat and feel the electricity seceed from your body. You cough out hardly a palm full of ash and get to your feet. The fleshy tunnel of the Eel's sarchophagus esophagus gives way to an icy chamber. Frost tinkles from the ice caked walls and ceiling, giving the impression of snow. The floor gradually steepens into an incline, at the top of which stands a yeti. It hollers some nonsense at you before rolling a large snowball down the hill at you, and begins swiftly forming another from the frost at it's feet. You succeed in your reflex check and nail the quick time event- rolling out of the way of the snow boulder. You begin to climb the hill before it can send down another, but slip the instant you begin!

    ====
    TASK "Yeti":
    Get up the hill, avoid any snowballs, deal with the Yeti.
    ====

    At the top of the hill is the entrance to an igloo set into the wall. You pass through the passage, as one does, and find yourself in a submarine glass tunnel. Bathed in caustic light, you continue down the tunnel, the sound of your footsteps on the metal grating floorsending tinny echoes through the air. You sense an inexplicable dopey presence but continue onward in spite of the fact. You pass through an open entry way and hear the sea bridge you just left behind smash. A large green fish just took a big bite out of where you were just standing and water is rushing in. A metal door slides over the passage you just went through, blocking off the torrents of water rushing in. Through the door, you can faintly hear the room filling up, but it is no longer of any concern to you. You walk down the hallway you've found yourself in and come to an abrupt turn downwards. You look down the vertical corridor and see that it turns in on itself again at the bottom. You're gonna have to get down and around this hallway...gravity be damned.

    ====
    TASK "Plumbing":
    Go down and around this looping hallway. It turns down, then upside down, then back up, then flat again. There is a lever to pull at a dead end which will drop two walls to form a bridge across the first drop that you can pass over and into the next area...just...look at the picture.
    ====

    How in the hell did you manage THAT? You come out of the looping corridor, back on to flat ground.

    The sweet familiar smell of scientifically reproduced prehistoric flesh and high powered weaponry waft through the hallway, bringing back a feeling of nostalgia for your childhood days. Things were simpler back then. In the next chamber stands a Tyrannosaurus Rex. On it's head is mounted a laser guided rocket launcher. In it's diminutive ladylike hands, it holds guns akimbo; two desert eagles. On it's back is a jetback, because fucking balls if this dragon isn't gonna fly. You freeze in place, having seen in a documentary that T-Rex can't see you if you don't move.

    ====
    TASK "JurASSic Park:
    Get past the T-rexasaurus Rex, any substantial movement is gonna set this thing off like a sentry gun. Deal with it.
    ====

    Yeah yeah, great, you did it. Keep moving, I haven't got all day.
    You enter another large chamber, this time the walls are splattered with blood. Below you is a pit of spikes, across which is the exit. Between you and the exit is a blood stained platform, connected to your overhang by a thin metal bridge, overseen by an opressive statue of tentacles reaching for the ceiling. On the platform stands a simian humanoid with two more arms than any living being should have. In each of it's four hands and in one foot it holds a weapon, obtained from adventurers who failed to pass this obstacle in the past. The Buster Sword, The Master Sword, Soul Edge, a Crowbar, and a Plasma Sword. Lining the walls of the chamber are overflowing crates with lables like "Whips", "Claws", "Arm Cannons", and a whole wall devoted to "Assault Rifles".

    ====
    TASK "Mortal Kombat":
    Defeat the Guardian. One you step on the platform, the bridge will retract and you will not be able to continue until the guardian is bested.
    ====

    You trimph over the guardian, and the metal bridge slides out of the arena to the opposite door. You cross the bridge but instead of passing through another door like you seem to have been doing every ten seconds until now, pure whiteness encroaches around you. You spin around and can see nothing but white. You hold out your hand to see if you've been blinded but you can see. You hear an ethereally tinged foot tapping behind you and spin around once more. Before you is a shadowy figure, two points of red light where eyes should be. Behind the figure floats the final key in the air, bathed in a similar darkness. As you focus on the smokey dark figure, you find it's a bit too familiar to you. In the shadows you see yourself, only even uglier than usual. You attempt to dispose of this doppleganger through violence, but every assault you make on it, it makes an equal and opposite action to completely disarm your attack.

    ====
    TASK "Masturbation":
    Confront yourself. Anything you can do, it can do the same. Any action you take, it will try to stop you by taking the opposite action.
    ====

    You somehow manage to destroy your dark double which dissipates and fills the space around you with blackness. The key drops in front of you, as much as you can percieve a front right now. You walk forward through the nothingness and pick it up. A door appears in front of you, it's edges made up of infinite colors, like the one you came through. Having nowhere else to go but forward, you step through the door and find yourself back in the room where you started, all three keys in hand. You walk to the case that contains your prize and--
    (To be continued...)
  • ====
    TASK "Devil":
    Get across the pit of juiced non-believers and show that Beelze Bub what-for!
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Cover System":
    You're safe...for now, but you can't just sit around forever. You have to get across this firing range without having your cranium ventillated.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Cerberus":
    Get past the Hellhound. You can't cross the room without being within it's range of Chihuahuan mayhem.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Major Tom":
    Figure out some kind of fuel or alternate form of propulsion to get the rocket moving.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Minuteman":
    Get the key from the alien's stomach. Show it some good ol' fashioned All American tenacity. Comin' over here; takin' our craters...
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Ecofriendly:
    Cross this gap. The Hippie will not let you harm the tree
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Snorlaxative":
    Get past this Snorlax!
    ====

    ====
    Riddle 1: "What is black and white and red all over?"
    ====

    ====
    Riddle 2: "What is Slimy, Hairy, Cynical, Tired, and can't spell 'Obfuscated'?"
    ====

    ====
    Riddle 3: "What is Delicious, Soggy, Malodorous, and has no sense of Irony?"
    ====

    ====
    Riddle 4: "What is Short, Dull, Rigid, Smooth, and Pariplegic?"
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Sphinx":
    Come up with a good riddle for the cat.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Cliffhanger":
    Get to the bottom of the cliff.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Smark":
    Get the key without getting caught in a slobberknocker with King and Zangief!
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Yeti":
    Get up the hill, avoid any snowballs, deal with the Yeti.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Plumbing":
    Go down and around this looping hallway. It turns down, then upside down, then back up, then flat again. There is a lever to pull at a dead end which will drop two walls to form a bridge across the first drop that you can pass over and into the next area...just...look at the picture.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "JurASSic Park:
    Get past the T-rexasaurus Rex, any substantial movement is gonna set this thing off like a sentry gun. Deal with it.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Mortal Kombat":
    Defeat the Guardian. One you step on the platform, the bridge will retract and you will not be able to continue until the guardian is bested.
    ====

    ====
    TASK "Masturbation":
    Confront yourself. Anything you can do, it can do the same. Any action you take, it will try to stop you by taking the opposite action.
    ====
  • Contest should be first person to read all of both your posts and explain it back to you as proof of it being done..
  • Updated 3rd Post with all of the Tasks without the narrative to read through.

    vowel said:
    Contest should be first person to read all of both your posts and explain it back to you as proof of it being done..


    Certainly there is a lot to read there but once you get through that the contest itself takes very little effort.
  • Sent in my entry. Took a while. Worth doing.
  • Sunflower said:
    Sent in my entry. Took a while. Worth doing.


    I wouldve hoped you meant worth doing as to provide entertainment for others to read what you wrote, but you didn't because you PMed it instead. This leads me to believe its worth doing for the prize, which IT IS NOT. THAT GAME BLOWS!!! This thread is way better then the game and I plan on posting my answers when I get the time to do so.
  • Worked on it for a little bit...will try to finish it...maybe im makeing this too silly/detailed.
  • Sandata said:
    Worked on it for a little bit...will try to finish it...maybe im makeing this too silly/detailed.


    Silly and detailed (to a certain degree) is what I want.

    Fry-40 said:
    [quote=Sunflower]Sent in my entry. Took a while. Worth doing.


    I wouldve hoped you meant worth doing as to provide entertainment for others to read what you wrote, but you didn't because you PMed it instead. This leads me to believe its worth doing for the prize, which IT IS NOT. THAT GAME BLOWS!!! This thread is way better then the game and I plan on posting my answers when I get the time to do so.[/quote]

    Feel free to do so. I haven't even played the game myself, I just have a spare copy of it. Thanks for the compliment, even if it's really a non-compliment if the game is as shitty as you say. The only reason I didn't want people to post them in the thread is so that I can judge everyone's answers without having to bother with duplicate (or similar, at least) answers unless the obstacle was designed too restricting to cause a certain answer to become more obvious.

    That being said, I don't really care and I just want people to have fun with the contest, whether they do it for the game or, even better, do it because it's fun (I hope!).
  • Contest Closed.
  • Damn! Just noticed it.

    CRC

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